Our Differences Make Us the Same

This handsome little guy (the one with the great smile) is the son of KaBao, the author of our final entry on chapter 5. She said he was playing with this other boy in a mall play area. She explained that, she wants "to teach him that everyone looks and acts differently, but they can all play together. Their similarities will help them to continue sharing about their differences."

I think I might have been smiling like her son when I read her entry, and I think you'll enjoy it, too.

In chapter five, the girls confronted each other about their own stereotypes about each other. Suzanne’s confession letter was a brave move, I thought. It is often difficult to confront others about our own feelings when we know that it will hurt the other person. The girls gathered together to settle their issues because if they wanted to continue with the faith club, they would have to let their own stereotypes go.

This chapter helped me realize that stereotyping happens all the time. As a child, I never realized that it existed because no one told me directly what their stereotypes of me were. I remember that in elementary school, my fellow classmates would always want to sit by me during our math sessions. I never thought that they were stereotyping me until now, really. That Asians are naturally good in math was the stereotype. My classmates always complimented how easily I understood the problems and wanted to be my friends. For once in my life, I felt like I belonged. I was so pleased by the thought of having friends that the stereotypes blew right past my head. My family moved around so much during my childhood that I never had friends. Having this group of kids become my friends because I was good in one subject seemed reasonable at the moment.

This chapter also reminded me of being stereotyped by kids who were from the same ethnic background. Some of the girls in school picked on me because I seemed to be “white-washed.” Yes, I agree that my parents spoke to me in English more than the rest, bought brand-name materials for me, and we were not as traditional as the majority, but that did not mean I was whitewashed. It made me not want to befriend my own kind so I never really had Hmong friends until the eighth grade.

I agree with what Suzanne said – that being from a majority group does not mean that she is unable to connect to some of the feelings that a minority group might have. People have minority groups that they can belong to even if they are the majority. To me, this means that everyone has problems in their lives, and though some are more devastating than others, they are all struggles. For example, I grew up with enough income so I had no problem skipping out on meals while others only had one meal per day. One thing I always tell people who stereotyped me is that my parents worked so hard to make sure we had everything we wanted that we hardly saw them throughout the day. Some of my peers never had that longing for their parents because their parents were always home when they were home. I struggled through my childhood waiting for my parents to come home from their long shifts so I could get my goodnight kiss before bedtime. Even though we seemed to have a good life, it did not mean that our life was perfect. We never know what goes on behind closed doors so before we stereotype, we should allow ourselves to get to know one another.

This point also goes with my next thought about child development. I want to encourage young children to understand their differences and similarities. Learning that at a younger age is more beneficial because I believe that it will prevent them from stereotyping each other. The reading has inspired me to point out not only what our similarities are but our differences as well. I am beginning to think that it is our differences that make us similar. We all are different in many ways and somehow that makes us very similar, if that makes any sense at all. The reading also inspired me to not judge different groups of people because I may unknowingly be talking about them directly to them. Sometimes we do and say things without thinking, not realizing how hurtful those things can be for others. If we can teach young children to accept differences in life, there will not be so many hate groups in the world.